This Day

When my daughters were small, I would often ignore or gloss over these minor holidays. It seemed like it was just a lot of extra effort to participate in these things. Finding something green, making sure my girls had something green, getting into the whole spirit of it, all seemed like a lot more organizing than I had time for. I’m not particularly regligious, and Easter has never been especially meaningful for me in that way. Halloween is just too much work.

I save my energy for Christmas and birthdays and the every day energy that goes into loving a family.


The whole concept of luck, though, is near and dear to my heart. I am lucky, and I count my blessings every single day. I have more than my share of amazingness in my life, and don’t take any of it for granted.

Especially because my daughter has an illness that could take her from me at any time.

I work hard at my luck. My job takes long hours, and I enjoy what I do. I work hard to make time and energy for my family. I work at helping my daughter fight her illness, and I work at helping her manage when it gets to be too hard for her to do it on her own.

Some day there will be a cure. I feel that in my bones. There will be a time when something can fix depression, whatever its cause — some new therapy, a different type of medicine, new understanding of how depression messes with the brain.

Until then, we’ll take each day, hour, moment, as it comes, embracing the next day, hour, moment. Breathe deeply, not only to steady ourselves, but to take it all in. We’ll work hard for our luck, appreciate it all, and maybe even today, we’ll wear green.



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